We found out....again

(Making sure everyone still knows it's his couch before we head out to the vet)

Today started with a phone call from the vet.  A lady by the name of Audrey who was very kind and is the director of the Caven Hills Vet Clinic.  She took on Titan's case herself and promised the best care possible.  First she got down to business.  Titan did have some sort of bone cancer, 85% bone compromised.  She would like to do tests such as xrays, blood work, ct scan, full heart work up, ultrasound, and bone biopsy.  She told me to talk this over with my husband and to come into the clinic for 9pm tonight.  That was when her shift finished and she would be able to spend whatever time we needed talking to her and getting answers.  She also told us that after everything Titan had been through she would only charge us for his pain meds, not for any tests or for Titan to stay there the few days she would need to get the tests done.  What a relief as this normally costs almost $2000 and we were only going to pay $350.  I agreed and felt better about having some sort of game plan.

Next I had to think about our options.

Option A:  We do the tests and it comes back that the only spot that has any issues is his ankle.  We can amputate.  However, we need to really think about how Titan would get around on 3 legs and if this would give him mobility again.  We wouldn't want to do this and find out Titan continues to just lay on his blankets and not want to do anything.  Also budget, what prices are we looking at as the amputation also comes with chemo treatment as well to insure no spreading of the cancer.  A dog Titan's size, this could get pricey.  

Option B: The cancer has spread to other parts and we just make him comfortable for the last little while.  Not what anyone wants, but we wouldn't want to put him through any more pain or discomfort.  Plus we need to consider quality of life.  

To be honest I don't like either option.  I wish this never happened and we weren't facing such a horrible choice, but here we are.  We need to keep moving forward and think of the best possible future for Titan.  

The day passed quickly as I just spent it napping beside Titan while Ares snored away on the couch beside us.  We had lots of cuddles and we even shared a fortune cookie.  That he would eat!  He took his meds like a good boy and let me feed him his pate.  We went outside for a nice chilly walk around his yard and he made sure to sniff everything.  Then Mike was home and it was time to go back to the vet.  We once again made the long drive to the vet with me and Titan cuddled up in the back, his head resting on my lap the whole way.  He didn't even cry this time.  I told him what was going to happen and started crying and he licked my face and the tears away as if to say "It's ok mom".  When we got there Titan was once again eager to jump out of the van and show everyone how well he moves around on 3 legs.  He even decided to sit on the bench himself this time instead of on dad's lap, such a brave boy. 

When we finally got called in and we met with Audrey she was so understanding and took to Titan right away.  We looked at the xrays and could see how it was missed when we first went into the vet.  There was a small odd spot in the bone that unless pointed out wouldn't be noticed, 6 vets were called in to see if they caught it at first glance and none did.  Then fast forward a month and you can see from this xray how quickly the bone was eaten away.  

(The fuzzy area that looks like it's pushing through the bone is abnormal growth and the cancer we are dealing with)

We went over all our options together and all the info about the tests again.  I really felt confident about doing the tests first to make sure we have all the info in front of us to make a proper decision.  So with that we had to once again hand over the leash (really not easy to do this time) and let Titan go with the vet.  They said after all he's been though they didn't want to keep him in a kennel, so he would be on a bed of blankets in the office where someone will always be around to share their lunches.  I knew right there he would be just fine for a few days.  There was even a tail wag.  

The ride home tonight was hard, both Mike and I had tears in our eyes, but took comfort in knowing we are doing what we can.  We also were given an xray of Titan's heart which I love having.  It's a big heart for a big dog and I'm sure it's full of love.  

So now we wait, with Ares who did go looking for his brother when we got home, and we call the vet in the morning to get an update on the first round of tests.  Keep sending those positive thoughts everyone, they are much appreciated at this time.